*nearby lesbian laughter*
*muffled asexual snickering*
*conflicted pansexual noises*
*moderately panicked bisexual muttering*
HETEROSEXUAL SCREAMING IN ANGUISH
Laughter from anyone who realises condoms are not the only form of birth control.
Louder laughter from those that remember that STDs and STIs are an actual thing that happen whether one is on the pill or not.Laughter stops as people remember that STDs and STIs are an actual thing that happen whether one is on the pill or not.
Literally everyone, regardless of orientation, mutters awkwardly and shuffles away as they remember that STDs and STIs are an actual thing that can happen to anyone who is sexually active, and not just heterosexual people.
*asexual snickering increases in volume*
Hagrid Hagrid Potter, you were named after the onLY GUY IN MY LIFE WHO LOOKED OUT FOR ME WITH ZERO ULTERIOR MOTIVES HE LITERALLY JUST CARED ABOUT ME BECAUSE HE WAS A GENUINELY NICE PERSON AND HE DESERVES SOME RECOGNITION FOR THAT